The Diet Starts Tomorrow

I love the fair. It is dirty, hot and typically smells bad. What could get any better than that? Ok, so I have no idea why I love the fair. I don't go on the rides. I have never purchased a chamois. What I do is eat.

Judge all you want, but fair food is fantastic. Specifically, all I have been talking about all year is eating one of these:



I love the deep-fried goodness of the funnel cake and I justify eating one by only enjoying it once a year at the California State Fair. First thing in the morning, I was pumped for it. After a lunch of fried stuff with cheese and then some walking around in exhibit halls, it was time to purchase and fulfill the yearlong anticipation of funnel cake. It was at this moment that I made a very serious decision. Based on the fact that it was literally 106 degrees outside, the thought of once again eating something that was deep-fried in hot oil was honestly repulsive. It was a tough realization to come too, but instead I opted for one of these:



I figured it was a healthier choice; Chocolate dipped, sure, but fibrous at the same time. And no, there is not a picture of me eating it, as I am trying to keep this website "PG-13," at least for the time being. However, I do have a picture of Brittaney eating what is called a "Super Jumbo" (i.e. 10-inch long) corn dog that I will also not be posting -- not just because she said "I don't want to see that picture on the Internet" but also because she is a mother and I have respect for her children. So we'll just go ahead and leave that one up to the imagination.

We were nearing the end and I was became saddened. All year I talked about this indulgence and I was about to leave the fair without that satisfaction. Just when I thought it was over, indulge I did! I knew that Toni, a fried-food connoisseur, would not let me down. It was not a funnel cake, but thanks to her, I tried my very first...deep-fried Oreo.

I know, I know. I used to think the same thing you're thinking right now. The person who thought of a way to make the Oreo cookie more fattening should be tarred and feathered. And I am sure you think I'm a little bit disgusting right now. Maybe you are finding it hard to remain my friend. But do not judge me. May I remind you of the old saying, "Thou shalt not knock it until thou tryeth it. Especially if it be dippeth in batter and fryeth to crispy perfection." So tryeth I did, and 'twas awesome.

The other thing I tried was deep-fried Coke. Yes, that is what I said. It was Coke-flavored batter in a Coke cup, topped with Coke syrup, whipped cream and a cherry. Okay, now you can go ahead and judge me. Unlike the Oreos, not worth it.

Yeah, so I went for a run today. It was my feeble attempt to gain back the 5 months of my life that I quite literally "ate" away on Sunday.

Goodbye State Fair! See you next year!